Sunday, January 24, 2016

5 Love Languages

I took the 5 Love Languages test again this week as I had forgotten what my results were from the previous tests.  While I am always a bit surprised by what my love language isn't at first, when I sit and think about it, things really do make sense.  I can definitely see how my two main love languages play an important role in my life, both romantic and non-romantic alike.  Here's hoping I can use this information to improve my communication skills in future relationships!




I went into more detail over on my YouTube channel and would love your feedback.

Were you surprised to learn the two languages most important to me?  What is your love language?  Have you found that being aware of this information has improved aspects of your life?

Friday, January 22, 2016

30 Days Of Yoga: Half Way Point




I started getting back into yoga in the fall, mostly out of frustration.  I needed mental clarity and needed to move my body but it turned cold and my long walks were just no longer possible.  Enter yoga!

I was doing it 5-6 days a week and then the holidays came.  The weeks before and after Christmas saw little exercise and then eventually a few days after Christmas, the plague...er...flu...came upon me.  

About nine days later, I made this video.  That I then held onto for a few weeks before recently posting on my YouTube channel.  




I was too sick to start doing my 30 days of yoga on the first of January.  However, I did start a few days later.  And yesterday, the 21st of January, was my 15th yoga workout for the year.  15 days of getting my fanny to the mat in just 21 days! 

While that might sound trite to some, that's really a huge step for me.  I'm trying hard to focus on my mental health this year.  I want to be a better human so that I can be a good partner in every other aspect of my life.  I see such a positive difference when I tuck my cuckoo in her clock daily.  I react better, I absorb information better, I am have more positive thoughts, I feel stronger and braver.  

I still don't feel love towards yoga.  Let's keep things honest around here...yoga and I aren't making googly eyes across the room at each other just yet.  Currently it's more of a grit your teeth and be nice to the sort of sweet but also sort of annoying neighbor across the street sort of relationship.  But I really love all of the benefits I am finding in so many aspects of my life when I practice daily.  So I press on.

Also, I look great in yoga pants!  #priorities

So I am half way to my 30 days of yoga goal.  It won't be done in the first 30 days of January, nor will it be done in a total of 30 days.  But I will come close enough on both to be really proud of myself.  

I'm learning, leaning in, pressing on, and saying yes!  This is, after all, my #yearofyes.  

Tell me about your January so far.  Have you been working on any goals?  Is it going well?  Are you giving yourself space to be imperfect but still accomplish things?  

XOKK


Thursday, January 21, 2016

Who Needs Sleep? No You're Never Gonna Get It! Insomnia For Days!

Name that tune!  Seriously though...big bonus points if you got the reference.  Immediate best friendship title bestowed upon you!

But back to me.  And sleep.  Or more specifically, the fact that I don't get any.

This has been an issue for me since early childhood.  On and off for my entire life, I've battled sleep issues.  When I was maybe six or seven, I went to a therapist who gave me a tape (for those too young to remember, a tape was what you listened to pre CD) that I played in my little tape recorder each night as I went to sleep. It was this very hippie  dippy monotone voice that was all "breathe in, breathe out, imagine the night sky and the stars...."  The idea was that I would fall asleep a portion of the way into the tape.  Instead, most nights I would reach the end of the tape, get out of bed, hit rewind, and start that puppy all over again.

I will say that my most severe sleep issues come and go.  There are seasons of time when they are worse than others.  And stress seems to play the largest roll in this little game of Who Needs Sleep.  (Answer: Me.  Always me!)

Until very recently, I thought nothing of the matter.  I mean, it's been more than 30 years.  This issue is just so much a part of my being that it doesn't even feel like an issue most of the time.  I'm very unaware of it and just sort of expect that I will feel tired more often than not.

However, my friend The Good Egg has taken on this (in my opinion) non-issue as her major concern in life.  Which is incredibly sweet that she seems to so genuinely care about my health and well-being.  But given my 30 year acceptance over the matter, I'm less than motivated to try new ticks.  I mean, I've made it this far, why change things now?

That said, a few weeks ago Butler Bestie, Belle, sent me a package of essential oils to try (more on that coming soon), including the much raved about Lavender.  So many friends have sung high praises for it's sleep inducing abilities.  And now The Good Egg has me convinced I need to go to the store to pick up some Melatonin.  Suddenly I am more aware than ever before that I should perhaps take this life-long battle more seriously and I'm reading up on various recommendations.  

So here's my question for y'all, do you have any tried and true tips and tricks to getting your mind to quiet enough to get a good night's sleep?  Or have you tried anything in the past that just doesn't at all work that I might want to avoid?  Have you tried Melatonin or lavender oil?  I'm sincerely interested in your insights here.  I realize that I typically write posts explaining what I've already done or how to do something.  But today, I'm simply seeking advice from friends.  Help a girl get a good night's sleep!

XOKK

Tuesday, January 5, 2016

Getting What I Need, Instead Of What I Want




Several months ago a new human came into my life.  It was clear we were on a mutual path and all of the adorable flirting and sparks and "no, you're cuter" conversations ensued.  I was excited for the first time in a while.  I felt like we had something between us.  It felt different, interesting, and real.

Little things happened.  I convinced myself I was overreacting, then this human apologized, and the relationship ticked on.  

Until it ended.  With me sobbing on the sofa of poor District and Mr. District, who weren't exactly sure what to do with me.  

I was so hurt.  More hurt than I had felt in ages, which didn't make a ton of sense because other than exceedingly long conversations, it's not like this had been an intense and lengthy relationship.  

But the way it ended left me feeling so worthless.  Just completely void of value in the world.  How could someone so seemingly kind be so stingingly cruel?

I hated that I let myself get to a point that I felt this way.  I let go of the power over myself.  I shrared and let someone in, tasks which I do not come by easily.

A few days later though, I picked up my proverbial boot straps and moved on.  I set up a new date.  With someone so age inappropriate that it's embarrassing, but let's not dwell on that.  My point is, I got back on the horse.  Or whatever.  I did my best to learn from the past and try again.

I had been in the best mood for the better part of a week, thanks in large part to my new tolerance (love at this point is too strong of a word...just keeping things honest around here) of yoga.  And then one random morning I woke up with a sinking feeling that something was wrong with that human.  That person who had blocked me out of their life was just in the pit of my stomach.  Admittedly, I ignored it at first. And finally by late afternoon, I took a chance and reached out.  I simply said I hope all is well and I was there if needed.  

A few hours later, we were talking.  It was a 48 hour wave of confessions and stories and updates that I never expected.  There was so much gratitude on the other end of the phone towards me.  I had truly been sincere in offering friendship.  I'm not sure I realized quite how deeply I meant it at the time, but I really did intend to follow through.  

That was weeks ago.  And it feels like a lifetime ago.  

I never could have predicted the path our relationship would take when we first began conversing.  But I can say with complete sincerity that I am grateful for the solid friendship we have now.  We bring something fresh and different into each other's lives.  

While I wouldn't choose to repeat parts of our story, I would absolute want the end result to remain the same if given the opportunity to do it all over again.  I wanted a date, but it turns out I needed a friend more.  I am incredibly thankful for our twisted happy ending.  

To friendship and getting what we need, even when it's not what we think we want!

Friday, January 1, 2016

Happy New Year!

Today is the first blank page of a 365 page book.  Write a good one!

Cheers to our very best 2016, y'all!  I can't wait to see what great new adventures are on the agenda this year.  I've made some big goals and will talk all about it on Monday.  I'm ready for a big time this year and am excited to share it with you.

XOKK

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