Wednesday, June 8, 2016

Sadie Sunday: Last Kiss Memory 4 Weeks After She Died

Four weeks ago today, your soul left this little earth, my baby bunny.  I just have to believe you are in a better, happier, pain free place now.  You are chasing squirrels and sunshining your days away.  And playing with your other fur and human family members to pass before you.  And looking down on me giving me kisses.

Dreaming up this euphoria is the only thing that gets me through the nights.  I hope it's real.  And I hope it means we will see each other again.  

I have so much to say.  In fact I have so many posts banked that I just have yet to find the courage to hit publish on.  But today, let me just tell you that I love you.  I love you with every fiber of my being and still feel you near me daily.  You will always be my little soul mate and the love of my life.

On this day four weeks ago, your very last few hours with me, early that morning when we got up after not sleeping and you being in so much pain, you gave me the greatest last gift I could have imagined.  And I am writing it down so that I never ever forget it.  

You gave me kisses.  A bit later when Poppy came to you, you gave him kisses too.  It was something you always gave me first thing in the morning.  But not when you felt ill.  I think you knew that I needed them.  I needed them not only in that moment but to have that memory for my lifetime.  You found the energy on your very last morning to give me those sweet, special kisses.  We were in our bedroom by the door.  I can still feel them on my face.  That one moment has carried me through so many sad moments, Sadie.  No gift will ever top those kisses!

Your kisses were gentle and slow and just so sweet.  You loved to kiss my face first thing in the morning.  And you loved it in the summertime when Poppy would let you kiss his bald head.  (Something he said he hated but we both know he grew to adore.) You were the sweetest, kindest baby from the moment you came into this world and remained that way until your very last breath.

Thank you for loving me, Sadie.  Thank you for teaching me about love.  Thank you for making me smile.  And thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for your last kisses

I love you all day, everyday, my baby bunny!  

XO Momma 

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